The savage beast

If I were writing erotica, that title would have an entirely different meaning.¬† ūüôā¬† My friend Steph writes erotica and blogged about it yesterday.¬† She’s pretty cool and has an amazing command of the language.¬† If you’re interested, check out www.stephaniejulian.com.¬†

I haven’t posted in a few days.¬† I was trying to get my head back together after a little emotional turmoil.¬† It’s not over yet, but it’s fading.¬† They say time heals all wounds.¬† I don’t think so.¬† I think it just makes the wounds easier to live with.¬† They never really go away, even when you can accept them.¬† It’s kinda like a tattoo you wish you’d given more thought to.¬†

I haven’t written a word of fiction since Sunday, since I got my NJRW entry in and then gave myself the night off.¬† It turned into four nights off, until yesterday.¬† I wasn’t feeling all that great; the boys were both home and together, which of course meant noise.¬† I sat looking at my Favorites, wondering what else I could read to keep myself from thinking too hard, when it occurred to me that maybe the reason I wasn’t feeling so hot was because I’d gone a few days without listening to music.¬† (It didn’t help that my iPod was out of charge.¬† I still don’t know how that happened; I hadn’t turned it on since I got back from NJ on Sunday.)¬† I charged up the Pod and put on the headphones and chose the Playlist for “Release Point”, all the songs that I heard while I was working on the story–and since–that made me stop and think, “Oooh, that fits Grace/Paul/the scene where…”¬† Fifty-something songs in all.¬† Probably the most fun you can have with your clothes on.¬† Some of those songs really made me feel like I was in the scene as I was writing it.¬† Once in a while I’d hear the song and¬†work on the scene but the song would end before the scene was over, so I’d put the song on “repeat” and get back to work.¬† I’ve heard Kelly Clarkson’s “Because of You” at least a hundred times and I’m still not tired of it.¬†

Anyway, I put the playlist on and opened an online¬†jigsaw puzzle, but something about hearing the familiar music kicked me where I badly needed to be kicked.¬† I heard that inner voice again, telling me “You have to keep working on this.”¬† So I did.¬† I shut down the puzzle–and thank God; those things are addicting!–and opened the manuscript and started reading again.¬† Then¬†I started writing.¬† I added a page before I had to stop and get dinner started.¬† It made me feel human.¬†

Music truly do hath charms to soothe the savage beast.¬† (Yes, I know it’s actually “breast” but I like my version better so I’m claiming poetic license.)¬† I need to turn on the music and escape myself more often.¬†