Salvation

It hasn’t been a fun week, and I’ve been kind of tired, but through it all, I’ve been writing as much as possible, every chance I get. 

Yesterday I got a rejection from an agency I queried 6 months ago.  I’d debated querying them again, just because I wasn’t entirely sure they’d gotten the query in the first place.  Apparently they did, and they didn’t like it.  Wonderful. 

A few other things stepped on my toes, but I was determined not to drink to numb myself against what bothered me.  Even yesterday, after the rejection came in, my first thought was a vodka and lemonade, but I decided not to.  Instead I was determined to focus on keeping the story moving.

This morning I had another Deus Ex iPod experience again, starting with Elvis Costello’s “Every Day I Write the Book”, and a couple of Van Halen songs that kept my spirits up on the way to work.  Every chance I got, I kept at it, until I made some changes that will probably cut 30 pages from the 70 I have now, but I think the story’s getting stronger.  A few times, I’ve hit on points where I sat back and thought, “Hey, that means something.” 

It occurred to me tonight, between working in the garden, helping Alex in the bath (he’s a little upset that we’ve limited his Mr. Softee visits, but I don’t have $14 a week to spend on ice cream), and making dinner, that it’s the writing that saved me.  I haven’t had a drink besides straight lemonade since last week.  I didn’t even meet John at Steppy’s on Friday night, because I’d rather write than drink.  When I drink, my Muse relaxes too and conks out cold, and I don’t write another word.  Lately, though, I’ll tolerate everything else if it means I can keep writing.  If nothing else comes of it, at least I know that writing has saved my liver.  🙂

Something else I noticed, too.  Even when I’m in the worst mood, it’s still all good.  We saw “Star Trek” on Saturday, and after we came home, I went on IMDB to find out who played which characters.  Randy Pausch played a character on the USS Kelvin, early in the movie.  If I’d known he was there, I would’ve looked for him.  I still think The Last Lecture was absolutely fantastic–clear an hour and 15 minutes in your schedule, sit down and watch it–and ironically enough, John just got a copy of it from Readers Digest’s book collection (along with a Nicholas Sparks book, which I won’t be reading because I’m SO not a fan).  I’d love to have John–and pretty much everyone I know–read “The Last Lecture” because it puts life in such a totally clear perspective.

Okay, now to go back to climbing those walls…

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