One Day

Not sure where to start this one. I had a post in mind but then the news broke yesterday about Junior Seau, and I have to say, my heart’s still a little broken. I got into football before he started in the NFL but he’s one of the reasons I really got into it. He played with heart and soul. He was one of those players who really left it out on the field. I admire that in people in general.

It broke my heart to hear that he’d killed himself. (I almost lost it when I saw Jimmy Rollins’ tweet, “Damn Junior, not like that.”) My therapist says one of my issues is that I’m a “kindness hog”; that I’ll do anything for anyone, but I don’t like when people do things for me. (Especially when I truly need their help.) I got the feeling from the reports I saw that he was one of those people too. He didn’t know how to ask for help, or to lean on someone when he needed it. He was one of those “I am an island!” type people, and really, we can’t be like that. We’re part of a society, whether we like it or not. As my therapist said, if I get a nice feeling from helping someone, why am I denying them the chance to enjoy that same feeling they might get from helping me? It’s selfish, and while selfishness and treating myself as someone who deserves good things and happiness is something I need to adapt to, this is one selfish aspect I really should share. (I hope that makes sense. I’ve only had 2 cups of coffee.)

This morning I was trying to catch the score of last night’s Ranger game (I fell asleep in the 2nd OT intermission; go Blueshirts!) and ESPN showed an interview with Marcellus Wiley. Big as the guy is, he started to lose it when he talked about Junior and what an amazing person and athlete he was, and how hurt he was to know Junior couldn’t open up to the people who cared about him. Seeing a big guy like that nearly in tears? It’s not easy to watch, and it brings a lot of emotions to the surface.

I’ve heard it said Marilyn Monroe inspires fantasies in men and women alike:  both genders thinks if they’d just known her, they could’ve saved her. Junior Seau could be the same, though I suppose his influence isn’t as far-reaching as Marilyn’s.

Which brings me to my point, because I do have one. 🙂  We all need to take some time to figure out who the Juniors and Marilyns are among us. It’s not easy to see. We hide well behind our “sure I’m fine” façades. Rather than live with regrets when it’s too late, why not say something nice to someone, just to let them know you noticed and you care? It could make all the difference.

And if you’re a Junior or a Marilyn, I want to let you know I care, and if you need to talk, I’m right here. I don’t judge, and I’ll do what I can to make you laugh. Now that I’m learning and growing, I promise to come to you when I need your help too, because the song is true. We all get by with a little help from our friends and family.

Rest in well-deserved peace, Junior. We’ll miss you.